I am 65.
I’ve never been a person who frets about adding another year. I celebrate it. My life keeps getting better and better.
That said, there are curveballs.
Man! Like…didn’t see THAT coming.
I have three adult children, all married and off living their lives. Just like I raised them to.
But somehow, I never really thought about what it would mean for them to live hours and hours away.
I didn’t realize I was holding a quiet vision of regular family dinners. Of grandchildren bursting through my doors, so excited to see Nana. Of holidays and ordinary days spent together as the full gang.
It wasn’t a spoken dream. It was just… there.
Then reality arrived.
Their in-laws live closer. They’re part of weekly routines. We are not.
Our house was the “kid house,” always full. Now it isn’t.
There were hard moments. Real tears. Ugly crying. Because it was an adjustment.
Over time, I got to a place where I can genuinely celebrate all the love and support my kids and grands have in their lives. How lucky are they to have so many people who love them? How lucky am I that they are supported when I can’t be there?
Oof. The shift was REAL.
After years of a house full of kids, friends, students, and anyone who would otherwise be alone for a holiday, learning to enjoy a holiday that might just be me and my husband took another adjustment.
And probably the biggest realization of all?
Having “all of us” together matters differently to me than it does to the rest of the family.
That one took time to stop stinging.
All this to say that – yes, I love my life.
Realizing that I had underlying expectations of what this stage would look like…and then letting go of them? That took time.
I’m learning that it’s okay for life to look different from what I imagined.
Honestly? Nothing in my life has turned out exactly how I anticipated.
It’s been better.
Sometimes you just have to live through the surprises before you can see that.