Unless they specifically ask, shut your mouth.
When you’re in She Sees What Could Be Better, the correction instinct is the energy. Where you aim it is the most important piece.
This energy is designed for systems, institutions, patterns, and collective well-being. When the critical awareness goes toward work that benefits from it, amazing things happen. Problems get solved. Systems get healthier. That’s the She Sees What Could Be Better energy doing exactly what it’s supposed to do.
As a professor, part of my job was to assess and critique my students’ work. It became a habit. Yes, it was a necessary part of the job. I hated it at first. And that never really changed. Except for the really good work. That was always such a pleasure to assess.
I’m very lucky because my former students often reach out to connect with me and get together when they’re in town. Often they’ll share what they’re working on. It’s great fun. And man, there’s a part of me that has to put the brakes on and go, “You’re not their professor anymore. They don’t need your assessment and feedback, so unless they specifically ask for it, shut your mouth.”
Everyday life in the She Sees What Could Be Better energy is about being intentional about where you direct the correction energy. Is this a situation that needs fixing? Or are you applying the critical lens out of habit?
It also looks like having boundaries around applying this energy to the people you love. Your partner. Your children. Your closest friends. They need the version of you that can be with them without scanning for what needs improvement.
Everyday life in the She Sees What Could Be Better energy is also about turning the constructive instinct toward yourself with the same care you’d give other people. Compassionate identification of what needs attention. Taking steps toward fixing it. Then the acknowledgment that you’re already doing better than Critical Miss Cranky Pants will ever admit.
Find your happy. Love what you do. Make a difference. Come back to me safely. See ya!
