The clarity didn’t change what happened. It gave her peace.
Today we’ve moved into a new energy. For the next five days, we’re spending our time in the energy of She Trusts the Swirl.
When you’re in this energy, you process the past your own way. Not in a straight line. In a swirl. Memories circle each other. Images too. Somewhere in that swirl, something starts to form. A realization. A clarity. A way of finally understanding how something happened.
Getting there feels uncomfortable. And that’s totally the point.
I have consistent access to this energy. I can tell you, it’s not always easy. But there’s an amazing feeling of clarity once you’ve been through the swirl.
People who’ve been through real trauma know this well. At some point, you wonder why. It’s part of healing. Part of coming to terms.
I had a messed up childhood. From the outside, it looked normal. Maybe even perfect. Inside those walls, it was far from that.
For a long time in my early adulthood, I ignored it. That’s what my family did. We just kept moving forward. But eventually, a person has to process what happened. Has to come to terms with how it shaped who they are today.
There were so many pieces to the dysfunction. It made the story confusing, even to tell, let alone hear. What happened. What was still happening. There were times I was confused. Angry. Just a freaking mess.
I spent years trying to understand it. Trying to make sense of it. Nothing came through.
Eventually, I got some clarity. Then more. The clarity didn’t change what had happened. But it gave me peace in my heart.
Here’s the part I can share without risking triggering anyone. My parents did the best they could. They were dealing with their own stuff. When I see it through that lens, things make more sense.
There’s a song that perfectly fits this energy: Johnny Nash’s “I Can See Clearly Now.” The rain is gone, the clouds cleared away, and finally, you can see. That’s exactly this energy. Not forcing the clarity. Just, waiting for it. And then, one day, there it is.
Find your happy. Love what you do. Make a difference. Come back to me safely. See ya!
