My words were true. But I hurt my student in the process.
Miss Cranky here is under pressure. Constant, low grade, underlying mental pressure. Think of the beat from the song “Under Pressure” by Queen and David Bowie. That beat is the constant pressure of the cranky side of the She Always Has an Answer energy.
When this energy is always accessible to you, you’re wired to answer. Someone asks a question, raises a problem, mentions a situation, and before they finish the sentence, your brain is already working on the solution. It’s just how you’re wired. But the cranky side of this energy doesn’t wait to find out if the answer is right before it speaks up. It just throws the answer out there.
This is narrow-mindedness. It’s not exactly about being a stubborn know-it-all. It’s about being so driven to resolve the tension, the pressure, of an unanswered question that you reach for the nearest available answer, just to make the pressure stop. The answer comes out confident. It sounds solid. But it hasn’t been tested yet, so it may not hold up.
In the classroom, there were times when I answered a question too directly and, frankly, too honestly for the situation. My words were true, but I hurt my student in the process. And that hurt me too. That’s one of my biggest issues with this energy when I answer too quickly. My response isn’t well thought out, and my words can sting and even hurt. There’s such a thing as too direct.
The frustration here cuts both ways. When you don’t have enough information, the pressure to produce an answer anyway is uncomfortable. And when someone doesn’t receive your answer the way you expected, or when it turns out you were wrong, that lands hard too.
Cranky Pants energy here can get rigid, attached to the answer it already produced, instead of staying open to new information that might change things.
The low hum underneath it is, “I need to figure this out right now.”
Once I recognized this side of myself, I started qualifying my answers with something like, “I think it’s this, but I’m not entirely sure, so don’t quote me on it.” I obviously don’t answer this way in the classroom, but for me, timing my answer and taking the time to frame a softer response has become an important strategy with the cranky side of this energy.
Find your happy. Love what you do. Make a difference. Come back to me safely. See ya!
